Today is Brad Augsburger's birthday, and he is receiving the sweetest gift of his thirty-five years: watching his wife move out of the ICU and into a regular recovery room. That is expected to happen later today. Colleen has been waking up slowly, eating and drinking tiny bits at a time and being up for half-hour stretches. This is great news. We could so easily be coping with a different outcome.
Last night, I had the uncanny experience of learning the story of Katy Hayes, a Texas mother of three who is fighting the same rare Streptococcal A bacterial infection that Colleen is overcoming (this woman's baby was born just 5 days before Kaya). As Colleen was giving birth to Kaya, Katy was in surgery for the removal of several septic organs. She remains unconscious, is still on a ventilator, and is undergoing dialysis. Just yesterday, her husband Al had to make the heartbreaking decision to allow her doctors to amputate her hands and feet, because the bacteria was attacking the tissue in her extremeties. Without amputation, her team of doctors warned that the bacteria would spread fatally.
I cannot underscore enough the importance of routine postpartum visitation and care. I am very grateful for the close observation of Colleen's midwives, family members and postpartum care team. Her warning signs were noticed immediately, and she was admitted to Sarasota Memorial Hospital in time to avoid a very bad outcome. I am also extremely grateful to the team of physicians and nurses that has worked around the clock to literally save Colleen's life. This is an example of collaborative care between midwives and doctors, and for that, on so many levels, I am grateful.
Baby Kaya, his siblings, and his daddy have been sustained by the most incredible community here in Sarasota, one that I attribute greatly to the two birthing centers here, their midwives, and their family of families. Mothers have pumped their milk to ensure Kaya's healthy beginning on this earth. The Augsburgers and their care team have been fed every night from a different family, and their food train is booked through mid-March. They have received donations of fresh produce, baby items and food delivery from local businesses. Brad would like to extend deep gratitude to those that have donated money while he is unable to work. He does not expect to be able to work again until April, so donations are still being graciously accepted so this family of five can reunite, heal, and care for each other, worry-free.
This next phase of recovery will be a long one, but a joyous one. More info on a benefit coming soon!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
A Very Special Family
Colleen and Brad Augsburger welcomed their third baby, Kaya Soul, into the world on February 16th. Kaya was welcomed by big sister Ivy Magnolia and big brother Rylan Sky to create a new family of five. Since Kaya's birth, Colleen has been admitted to the ICU at Sarasota Memorial Hospital.A rare but dangerous bacterial infection, unrelated to but exacerbated by the event of birth, began causing organ damage and severe dehydration. Colleen had three surgical procedures at once on February 20th and remains on a ventilator. Though she is still in critical condition, her team of doctors expects recovery. She is currently sedated and stable after a strong antibiotic blood treatment.
Her family is strong and supported, but their daddy will be unable to work as a painter while he cares for them and for his recovering wife. Please consider helping this very special family, as they have done so much to make our community a better place.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
BIRTH STORY: Express Delivery!
(by Louise McKenzie, about the birth of Jim Xander Berkeley, born 02.03.10)
I woke up feeling rejuvenated and very positive. My mind was clear and I felt ready to blast out some work! And so I did, Jimmy (my hubby) and I working side by side! Before I knew it four hours had gone by, and we knew it was time for everyone to eat. However, so energized was I that I re-took the photos for the children’s project and told Jim to re-do my exercise photos.
I had had some pinchy contractions but I didn't really think about them too much! When we had finished, I went to change out of my exercise clothes feeling rather tired, odd and hungry I lay down on our bed and fell asleep.
Not thirty minutes had gone by when I was rudely awoken from my sleep with one very intense contraction! A second later I felt very wet! I yelped out to Jim who came running. There I was in a puddle! It was around 4:20p.m. I got cleaned up and then got back on the bed. In between contractions of about 3-4 minutes I hurriedly ate!
By 4:43 p.m. we called Harmony, our midwife. The contractions were strong and regular but I was completely lucid and in control, so I told Harmony that I would call when I needed her.
Throughout the nine months of this pregnancy I had worked towards trying to get to a point via a very intensive exercise program that would mean a more pain-controlled, speedy labor. Now, in the throws of labor, I was wondering whether in fact I was much closer to the birth than I realized due to the success of this strategy. The contractions were progressing towards the more painful level, but I chose not use that word verbally or in my mindset.
I focused on a circular movement of my head and upper body that was almost trance-like. I talked quietly to the baby and focused on how fantastic it was that I was going to finally meet him. I refused to let fear of any possible pain get the better of me. I went back to concentrating on the breath control technique I had used during those crazy exercise sessions! I imagined fresh blood being pumped into my womb, and that no lactic acid would build up.
So successful was this that by 6:00 p.m I went to step off the bed to use the bathroom when a huge wave of a contraction washed over me I had the urge to push, and so there was a scramble for the phone to call Harmony!
I was clambering in my head whether I was going to keep it together, or if the fear of pain was going to get the better over me. I held onto the night stand and I begun to sing! Yes, sing! The feeling was so insanely intense, so I just kept focusing on singing the baby out.
Before I knew Jim was telling me that his little head was out. They had this moment where they were just looking at each other! I remembered not to force anything, and waited for the next contraction. With those two pushes he was out! Jim had to catch him!I asked if the baby was okay and leapt up from the floor onto the bed. Jim was telling the children to fetch him towels! The baby was perfect and very calm. We were overjoyed. It just seemed too easy! All the children gathered around us; it was magical.
Minutes later there was a knock on the door and Harmony arrived. It was like a mini-party! We all were so happy. The music was still playing and the younger children were dancing. Harmony sat with the children to show them the placenta, which they all had great fun prodding and poking! Everything was serene and calm. Just as a birth should be.
This was our baby number six, and our fifth homebirth. (We had tried a homebirth with our first but after three days and three nights we had ended up in hospital.) Our children have all been present at the births and it has not only made them more enlightened, but has given them a special bond. There has never been any jealousy as a new little member has arrived, they have only thanked us as parents for the precious gift of another sibling.
All of our children, including our thirteen year old and five year old boys, find no shame in expressing their own desire to have children in the future. They understand what a privilege the gift of life is.
Perhaps if more children were included in the process our society would also benefit?
The fact that we have midwives is such a blessing, and the fact that we have choice should never be taken for granted. They have enabled us as a family such wonderful experiences and memories.
I hope that anyone who reads my story will find some inspiration to try it for themselves… We just look forward to doing it all over again!
I woke up feeling rejuvenated and very positive. My mind was clear and I felt ready to blast out some work! And so I did, Jimmy (my hubby) and I working side by side! Before I knew it four hours had gone by, and we knew it was time for everyone to eat. However, so energized was I that I re-took the photos for the children’s project and told Jim to re-do my exercise photos.
I had had some pinchy contractions but I didn't really think about them too much! When we had finished, I went to change out of my exercise clothes feeling rather tired, odd and hungry I lay down on our bed and fell asleep.
Not thirty minutes had gone by when I was rudely awoken from my sleep with one very intense contraction! A second later I felt very wet! I yelped out to Jim who came running. There I was in a puddle! It was around 4:20p.m. I got cleaned up and then got back on the bed. In between contractions of about 3-4 minutes I hurriedly ate!
By 4:43 p.m. we called Harmony, our midwife. The contractions were strong and regular but I was completely lucid and in control, so I told Harmony that I would call when I needed her.
Throughout the nine months of this pregnancy I had worked towards trying to get to a point via a very intensive exercise program that would mean a more pain-controlled, speedy labor. Now, in the throws of labor, I was wondering whether in fact I was much closer to the birth than I realized due to the success of this strategy. The contractions were progressing towards the more painful level, but I chose not use that word verbally or in my mindset.
I focused on a circular movement of my head and upper body that was almost trance-like. I talked quietly to the baby and focused on how fantastic it was that I was going to finally meet him. I refused to let fear of any possible pain get the better of me. I went back to concentrating on the breath control technique I had used during those crazy exercise sessions! I imagined fresh blood being pumped into my womb, and that no lactic acid would build up.
So successful was this that by 6:00 p.m I went to step off the bed to use the bathroom when a huge wave of a contraction washed over me I had the urge to push, and so there was a scramble for the phone to call Harmony!
I was clambering in my head whether I was going to keep it together, or if the fear of pain was going to get the better over me. I held onto the night stand and I begun to sing! Yes, sing! The feeling was so insanely intense, so I just kept focusing on singing the baby out.
Before I knew Jim was telling me that his little head was out. They had this moment where they were just looking at each other! I remembered not to force anything, and waited for the next contraction. With those two pushes he was out! Jim had to catch him!I asked if the baby was okay and leapt up from the floor onto the bed. Jim was telling the children to fetch him towels! The baby was perfect and very calm. We were overjoyed. It just seemed too easy! All the children gathered around us; it was magical.
Minutes later there was a knock on the door and Harmony arrived. It was like a mini-party! We all were so happy. The music was still playing and the younger children were dancing. Harmony sat with the children to show them the placenta, which they all had great fun prodding and poking! Everything was serene and calm. Just as a birth should be.This was our baby number six, and our fifth homebirth. (We had tried a homebirth with our first but after three days and three nights we had ended up in hospital.) Our children have all been present at the births and it has not only made them more enlightened, but has given them a special bond. There has never been any jealousy as a new little member has arrived, they have only thanked us as parents for the precious gift of another sibling.
All of our children, including our thirteen year old and five year old boys, find no shame in expressing their own desire to have children in the future. They understand what a privilege the gift of life is.Perhaps if more children were included in the process our society would also benefit?
The fact that we have midwives is such a blessing, and the fact that we have choice should never be taken for granted. They have enabled us as a family such wonderful experiences and memories.
I hope that anyone who reads my story will find some inspiration to try it for themselves… We just look forward to doing it all over again!
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Sentinel Event Alert: Maternal Mortality
The Joint Commission, the organization that accredits and certifies more than 17,000 health care organizations and programs in the United States, has issued a Sentinel Event Alert focused on Preventing Maternal Death. Joint Commission accreditation and certification is recognized nationwide as proof of a health care facility's adherence to certain performance standards. More importantly, its accreditation has become a condition of licensure, and subsequently, of Medicaid reimbursement.
Here are some highlights from the Alert:
Unfortunately, current trends and evidence suggest that maternal mortality rates may be increasing in the U.S., despite the rarity of the incidence of maternal death – deaths that occur within 42 days of birth or termination of pregnancy. Since 1996, a total of 84 cases of maternal death have been reported to The Joint Commission’s sentinel event database, with the largest numbers of events reported in 2004, 2005 and 2006. According to the National Center for Health Statistics of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, in 2006, the national maternal mortality rate was 13.3 deaths per 100,000 live births.
"There clearly has been no decrease in maternal mortality in recent years, and we are not moving toward the U.S. government’s Healthy People 2010 target of no more than 3.3 maternal deaths per 100,000 live births,” says William M. Callaghan, M.D., M.P.H., senior scientist, Division of Reproductive Health, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
The leading causes of maternal death are: hemorrhage, hypertensive disorder, pulmonary embolism, amniotic fluid embolism, infection, and pre-existing chronic conditions (such as cardiovascular disease). (Research) also indicated a four-fold increased risk of pregnancy-related death for black women, and increased risks for older women and women with no prenatal care. The numbers of deaths related to hemorrhage are declining, while deaths attributable to other medical conditions – including cardiovascular, pulmonary and neurologic problems – have significantly increased.
Several studies determined that from 28 to 50 percent of maternal deaths were preventable. In 2008, Hospital Corporation of America (HCA) looked at individual causes of maternal deaths among 1.5 million births within 124 hospitals in the previous six years. According to the HCA study, the most common preventable errors are:
-Failure to adequately control blood pressure in hypertensive women
-Failure to adequately diagnose and treat pulmonary edema in women with pre-eclampsia
-Failure to pay attention to vital signs following Cesarean section
-Hemorrhage following Cesarean section
“Pregnancy is a known major risk factor for venous thrombosis and pulmonary embolism. HCA now advocates for the universal use of pneumatic compression devices for all pregnant women undergoing Cesarean section.” Unlike nearly all other adult patients undergoing major surgery, pregnant women undergoing Cesarean delivery have traditionally not received prophylactic measures for the prevention of venous thromboembolism afforded similar surgical patients who lack this risk factor.
Each case of maternal death needs to be identified, reviewed, and reported in order to develop effective strategies for preventing pregnancy-related mortality and severe morbidity. To this end, The Joint Commission encourages participation by hospital physicians, including obstetrician-gynecologists, in state-level maternal mortality review and collaboration with such review committees in sharing data and records needed for review. The following suggested actions can help hospitals and providers prevent maternal death:
1.Educate physicians and other clinicians who care for women with underlying medical conditions about the additional risks that could be imposed if pregnancy were added; how to discuss these risks with patients; the use of appropriate and acceptable contraception; and pre-conceptual care and counseling. Communicate identified pregnancy risks to all members of the health care delivery team.
2.Identify specific triggers for responding to changes in the mother’s vital signs and clinical condition and develop and use protocols and drills for responding to changes, such as hemorrhage and pre-eclampsia. Use the drills to train staff in the protocols, to refine local protocols, and to identify and fix systems problems that would prevent optimal care.
3.Educate emergency room personnel about the possibility that a woman, whatever her presenting symptoms, may be pregnant or may have recently been pregnant. Many maternal deaths occur before the woman is hospitalized or after she delivers and is discharged. These deaths may occur in another hospital, away from the woman’s usual prenatal or obstetric care givers. Knowledge of pregnancy may affect the diagnosis or appropriate treatment.
Additional suggested actions for hospitals and providers to take for patients identified as high-risk (for example, those with pre-existing medical conditions such as hypertension, diabetes, morbid obesity):
4.Refer high-risk patients to the care of experienced prenatal care providers with access to a broad range of specialized services.
5.Make pneumatic compression devices available for patients undergoing Cesarean section who are at high risk for pulmonary embolism.
6.Evaluate patients who are at high risk for thromboembolism for low molecular weight heparin for postpartum care.
This is a huge step in the right direction. However, two of the four main preventable causes of maternal death result from cesarean sections. In light of research showing the correlation of elective cesareans to increased maternal death, what seems glaringly missing from the Joint Commission's suggested course of action is a campaign to educate patients (and physicians!) on the risks of elective cesarean section surgery. Instead of education, the Joint Commission suggests the universal use of pneumatic compression devices and prophylactic embolism prevention for women who undergo c-section surgery.
Dr. Steven Clark, medical director for women and newborn services for HCA, says in the Alert that "the only cause of maternal death amendable to nationwide systematic prevention efforts is pulmonary embolism." I urge Dr. Clark to take this statement further. Any maternal death that resulted from an unnecessary intervention or surgery was preventable. Proper nationwide systematic prevention efforts MUST include universal prenatal education about risks of and treatment following obstetric interventions.
Here are some highlights from the Alert:
Unfortunately, current trends and evidence suggest that maternal mortality rates may be increasing in the U.S., despite the rarity of the incidence of maternal death – deaths that occur within 42 days of birth or termination of pregnancy. Since 1996, a total of 84 cases of maternal death have been reported to The Joint Commission’s sentinel event database, with the largest numbers of events reported in 2004, 2005 and 2006. According to the National Center for Health Statistics of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, in 2006, the national maternal mortality rate was 13.3 deaths per 100,000 live births.
"There clearly has been no decrease in maternal mortality in recent years, and we are not moving toward the U.S. government’s Healthy People 2010 target of no more than 3.3 maternal deaths per 100,000 live births,” says William M. Callaghan, M.D., M.P.H., senior scientist, Division of Reproductive Health, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
The leading causes of maternal death are: hemorrhage, hypertensive disorder, pulmonary embolism, amniotic fluid embolism, infection, and pre-existing chronic conditions (such as cardiovascular disease). (Research) also indicated a four-fold increased risk of pregnancy-related death for black women, and increased risks for older women and women with no prenatal care. The numbers of deaths related to hemorrhage are declining, while deaths attributable to other medical conditions – including cardiovascular, pulmonary and neurologic problems – have significantly increased.
Several studies determined that from 28 to 50 percent of maternal deaths were preventable. In 2008, Hospital Corporation of America (HCA) looked at individual causes of maternal deaths among 1.5 million births within 124 hospitals in the previous six years. According to the HCA study, the most common preventable errors are:
-Failure to adequately control blood pressure in hypertensive women
-Failure to adequately diagnose and treat pulmonary edema in women with pre-eclampsia
-Failure to pay attention to vital signs following Cesarean section
-Hemorrhage following Cesarean section
“Pregnancy is a known major risk factor for venous thrombosis and pulmonary embolism. HCA now advocates for the universal use of pneumatic compression devices for all pregnant women undergoing Cesarean section.” Unlike nearly all other adult patients undergoing major surgery, pregnant women undergoing Cesarean delivery have traditionally not received prophylactic measures for the prevention of venous thromboembolism afforded similar surgical patients who lack this risk factor.
Each case of maternal death needs to be identified, reviewed, and reported in order to develop effective strategies for preventing pregnancy-related mortality and severe morbidity. To this end, The Joint Commission encourages participation by hospital physicians, including obstetrician-gynecologists, in state-level maternal mortality review and collaboration with such review committees in sharing data and records needed for review. The following suggested actions can help hospitals and providers prevent maternal death:
1.Educate physicians and other clinicians who care for women with underlying medical conditions about the additional risks that could be imposed if pregnancy were added; how to discuss these risks with patients; the use of appropriate and acceptable contraception; and pre-conceptual care and counseling. Communicate identified pregnancy risks to all members of the health care delivery team.
2.Identify specific triggers for responding to changes in the mother’s vital signs and clinical condition and develop and use protocols and drills for responding to changes, such as hemorrhage and pre-eclampsia. Use the drills to train staff in the protocols, to refine local protocols, and to identify and fix systems problems that would prevent optimal care.
3.Educate emergency room personnel about the possibility that a woman, whatever her presenting symptoms, may be pregnant or may have recently been pregnant. Many maternal deaths occur before the woman is hospitalized or after she delivers and is discharged. These deaths may occur in another hospital, away from the woman’s usual prenatal or obstetric care givers. Knowledge of pregnancy may affect the diagnosis or appropriate treatment.
Additional suggested actions for hospitals and providers to take for patients identified as high-risk (for example, those with pre-existing medical conditions such as hypertension, diabetes, morbid obesity):
4.Refer high-risk patients to the care of experienced prenatal care providers with access to a broad range of specialized services.
5.Make pneumatic compression devices available for patients undergoing Cesarean section who are at high risk for pulmonary embolism.
6.Evaluate patients who are at high risk for thromboembolism for low molecular weight heparin for postpartum care.
--
This is a huge step in the right direction. However, two of the four main preventable causes of maternal death result from cesarean sections. In light of research showing the correlation of elective cesareans to increased maternal death, what seems glaringly missing from the Joint Commission's suggested course of action is a campaign to educate patients (and physicians!) on the risks of elective cesarean section surgery. Instead of education, the Joint Commission suggests the universal use of pneumatic compression devices and prophylactic embolism prevention for women who undergo c-section surgery.
Dr. Steven Clark, medical director for women and newborn services for HCA, says in the Alert that "the only cause of maternal death amendable to nationwide systematic prevention efforts is pulmonary embolism." I urge Dr. Clark to take this statement further. Any maternal death that resulted from an unnecessary intervention or surgery was preventable. Proper nationwide systematic prevention efforts MUST include universal prenatal education about risks of and treatment following obstetric interventions.
Friday, January 22, 2010
BIRTH STORY: A Natural, Hospital VBAC
(by Nikki Zizak, about the birth of Anabelle Lily, born 01.04.09)
The night I went into labor, around 8 p.m. my husband, Chris and I were watching a movie when I felt a bit of pressure on my lower back. It wasn’t bothering me too much so we continued watching the movie while he rubbed my feet. We went to bed around 11 pm.
Around 1:00 a.m. I awoke with a strong contraction and stronger back pressure. I started to get really nervous and was hoping I wasn’t going into labor. My “VBAC friendly” doctor was not on call at the hospital that weekend and I was told that if I showed up at the hospital in labor, I would have to have another cesarean. At that point, my only hope of a VBAC was to hold off as long as possible, and show up at the hospital ready to push.
My contractions were coming every 30 minutes, which allowed me to sleep between them until around 4:00 a.m. when they started getting stronger and more regular. At 4:00 a.m., my lower back pressure really got to be painful. I had to stand up and lean over the bed during the contraction to help alleviate some of the pressure. I was getting nervous because I was pretty sure that Anabelle was posterior and was unsure of how I was going to handle back labor. I woke up Chris and told him what was going on. I was actually not positive I was in labor. It almost felt like I had to have a bowel movement, so I spent a good portion of an hour on the toilet trying to go. The sitting on the toilet actually helped alleviate the back pain.
When the contractions and back pain started to get stronger, I decided it would be a good idea to take a shower and bath, which also felt wonderful. At this point, I was still not positive I was in labor so I hadn’t called my doula or anyone else yet. My contractions were 10-15 minutes apart.
By 7:00 a.m., I was starting to think maybe I really was in labor so I decided to call my mother in law who would come over to pick up my son, Gavin so we could get ready to go to the hospital. She lives in North Port, so we knew it would be awhile before she would be here. The back pain was getting to be bad enough to where the only way I could really get around was to hunch over, or crawl around on my hands and knees. I was scrambling around trying to get Gavin and my bags packed while Chris fed everyone (Gavin, dog, cats).
Around 8:30 a.m. I called my “doula, Ann (who was acting as my doula, she is actually a massage therapist who is good personal friend of mine). Anyway, when I called her she could tell by my voice that I was getting close. The contractions seemed to be coming constantly. I wasn’t sure when one ended and the other began because the back pain was constant. It made it really hard to time the contractions. What got me through was breathing and trusting my body. I kept thinking “This isn’t so bad, I can do this”. (Compared to my intervention laced first birth, this was so much more manageable).
At 9:00 a.m. my mother in law came to pick up Gavin. I was having a really hard time moving around so the only place that felt good was to kneel on the floor and lean over onto the couch. I kept rocking back and forth when my mother in law came in and gave me some encouragement. I started crying because for some reason I felt like I was giving up by going to the hospital this early. I was starting to reach the end of my rope and I was really dreading the long drive to SMH.
At 9:30 a.m. we left for the hospital. I was unable to sit in the seat so I had to squat on the front seat of the car. It was the longest car ride ever. I just closed my eyes and envisioned waves crashing on the beach. We called Ann, my doula and she said she would meet us at the hospital. I was mentally preparing myself for the likely possibility of having to undergo another cesarean and was beginning to feel defeated because, again, I didn’t think I was far enough into labor. I couldn’t believe how bad back labor was and felt myself giving up physically and emotionally. I was praying they wouldn’t try to get me to have another cesarean. I remember Ann asking me several times, “how much are you willing to fight?”
When we got to the hospital, we went to check in. I had not pre-registered so this would have took a long time until a nurse walked by and saw me trying to fill out paperwork when she told the receptionist that she should just let me go and get a room. I got to the room at around 10:15 A.M. Ann was with us and she and Chris were wonderful support. I really didn’t want to be touched or anything, but just having them there was all I needed. Ann gave the nurses a copy of my birth plan while I got dressed and signed a couple papers. The nurse did a cervical check and found out I was 8 cm. I couldn’t believe it. No wonder I was feeling rough. That was when they had read over my medical chart and found out I was VBAC. The two nurses looked at each other with shock on their faces. The contractions and back pain were so bad now, I couldn’t think of anything else except how I was feeling.
The doctor came in and said, “Ok, let’s go”. The nurse asked if he was going to let me VBAC, and he told her that it was too late to turn back now. The next few minutes were a blur but I remember them getting me on all fours to attempt to turn Anabelle so she wasn’t posterior. Then it came time to push and I was feeling itchy, so pushing felt really good. After a few minutes she was out, 35 minutes after arriving at the hospital. I was so proud of myself, and so happy. Anabelle was the most beautiful little person in the world. She breastfed right away, and for the most part, my birth plan was followed. I’m so thankful and fortunate to have had such a good hospital VBAC.
The night I went into labor, around 8 p.m. my husband, Chris and I were watching a movie when I felt a bit of pressure on my lower back. It wasn’t bothering me too much so we continued watching the movie while he rubbed my feet. We went to bed around 11 pm.
Around 1:00 a.m. I awoke with a strong contraction and stronger back pressure. I started to get really nervous and was hoping I wasn’t going into labor. My “VBAC friendly” doctor was not on call at the hospital that weekend and I was told that if I showed up at the hospital in labor, I would have to have another cesarean. At that point, my only hope of a VBAC was to hold off as long as possible, and show up at the hospital ready to push.
My contractions were coming every 30 minutes, which allowed me to sleep between them until around 4:00 a.m. when they started getting stronger and more regular. At 4:00 a.m., my lower back pressure really got to be painful. I had to stand up and lean over the bed during the contraction to help alleviate some of the pressure. I was getting nervous because I was pretty sure that Anabelle was posterior and was unsure of how I was going to handle back labor. I woke up Chris and told him what was going on. I was actually not positive I was in labor. It almost felt like I had to have a bowel movement, so I spent a good portion of an hour on the toilet trying to go. The sitting on the toilet actually helped alleviate the back pain.
When the contractions and back pain started to get stronger, I decided it would be a good idea to take a shower and bath, which also felt wonderful. At this point, I was still not positive I was in labor so I hadn’t called my doula or anyone else yet. My contractions were 10-15 minutes apart.
By 7:00 a.m., I was starting to think maybe I really was in labor so I decided to call my mother in law who would come over to pick up my son, Gavin so we could get ready to go to the hospital. She lives in North Port, so we knew it would be awhile before she would be here. The back pain was getting to be bad enough to where the only way I could really get around was to hunch over, or crawl around on my hands and knees. I was scrambling around trying to get Gavin and my bags packed while Chris fed everyone (Gavin, dog, cats).
Around 8:30 a.m. I called my “doula, Ann (who was acting as my doula, she is actually a massage therapist who is good personal friend of mine). Anyway, when I called her she could tell by my voice that I was getting close. The contractions seemed to be coming constantly. I wasn’t sure when one ended and the other began because the back pain was constant. It made it really hard to time the contractions. What got me through was breathing and trusting my body. I kept thinking “This isn’t so bad, I can do this”. (Compared to my intervention laced first birth, this was so much more manageable).
At 9:00 a.m. my mother in law came to pick up Gavin. I was having a really hard time moving around so the only place that felt good was to kneel on the floor and lean over onto the couch. I kept rocking back and forth when my mother in law came in and gave me some encouragement. I started crying because for some reason I felt like I was giving up by going to the hospital this early. I was starting to reach the end of my rope and I was really dreading the long drive to SMH.
At 9:30 a.m. we left for the hospital. I was unable to sit in the seat so I had to squat on the front seat of the car. It was the longest car ride ever. I just closed my eyes and envisioned waves crashing on the beach. We called Ann, my doula and she said she would meet us at the hospital. I was mentally preparing myself for the likely possibility of having to undergo another cesarean and was beginning to feel defeated because, again, I didn’t think I was far enough into labor. I couldn’t believe how bad back labor was and felt myself giving up physically and emotionally. I was praying they wouldn’t try to get me to have another cesarean. I remember Ann asking me several times, “how much are you willing to fight?”
When we got to the hospital, we went to check in. I had not pre-registered so this would have took a long time until a nurse walked by and saw me trying to fill out paperwork when she told the receptionist that she should just let me go and get a room. I got to the room at around 10:15 A.M. Ann was with us and she and Chris were wonderful support. I really didn’t want to be touched or anything, but just having them there was all I needed. Ann gave the nurses a copy of my birth plan while I got dressed and signed a couple papers. The nurse did a cervical check and found out I was 8 cm. I couldn’t believe it. No wonder I was feeling rough. That was when they had read over my medical chart and found out I was VBAC. The two nurses looked at each other with shock on their faces. The contractions and back pain were so bad now, I couldn’t think of anything else except how I was feeling.
The doctor came in and said, “Ok, let’s go”. The nurse asked if he was going to let me VBAC, and he told her that it was too late to turn back now. The next few minutes were a blur but I remember them getting me on all fours to attempt to turn Anabelle so she wasn’t posterior. Then it came time to push and I was feeling itchy, so pushing felt really good. After a few minutes she was out, 35 minutes after arriving at the hospital. I was so proud of myself, and so happy. Anabelle was the most beautiful little person in the world. She breastfed right away, and for the most part, my birth plan was followed. I’m so thankful and fortunate to have had such a good hospital VBAC.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
You're Invited: An Evening with Healthy Start
Next Thursday, January 21, The Healthy Start Coalition of Sarasota County is partnering with Sarasota Architectural Salvage to host “An Evening with Healthy Start”, a fundraising event featuring live music by local band The Equines, food from local restaurants, beer and wine, fabulous raffles, and in-store specials with all proceeds going directly toward Healthy Start services.The Healthy Start Coalition of Sarasota County is a non-profit, 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to improving the health and well-being of pregnant women, infants, and young children in our community. We coordinate a variety of specialized programs to serve high-risk groups and address specific risk factors that contribute to fetal death, prematurity, low birth weight, and infant death. Our program includes home visits, education, counseling, and referrals for at-risk pregnant women. We also educate the community about important topics in maternal and child health.
Sarasota Architectural Salvage is a unique home remodeling store, featuring an eclectic array of furniture, architectural relics, and artifacts from historic Sarasota to around the globe. Located on Central Avenue near downtown Sarasota, it is a well-known staple of Sarasota businesses, popular among local designers, restoration specialists, remodelers, and the general public.
Tickets are $15 in advance and $20 at the door and include 2 drink tickets and a $5-off coupon to SAS. Tickets can be purchased online at www.sarasotasalvage.com or by calling (941) 362-0803.
Healthy Start's goal for this event is to raise at least $2,000 to go toward training three Certified Lactation Counselors to provide breastfeeding education and support to Sarasota families. These services are invaluable to new mothers and greatly increase the success rate of breastfeeding, which provides the most optimal nutrition for newborns, increased maternal-child bonding, and stronger immune systems.
Please join us for what is sure to be a fun and memorable event!
Friday, January 8, 2010
BIRTH STORY: A Harmonious, Healing Birth
(by Jessica Dempsey, about the birth of Gavin Newton Robertson, born 01.22.08)
Well, my water broke at a trickle at 7pm on Jan. 21st. I was getting off of the sofa and felt a little "pop" in my upper belly. I didn't think anything of it until I stood up and started trickling! After I was sure it was my water and not just me peeing myself (not going to miss THAT finer point of pregnancy!!), I called my midwife, Harmony. Since I had not started having any contractions yet, she told me to go to bed and get some rest. Being as excited as I was, I got off the phone with Harmony and promptly started cleaning my house. After cleaning and making sure everything was packed, I showered. I recall looking down at my pregnant belly while I was in the shower, thinking that this was the last shower I'd be taking with my baby inside of me...next time he would be earth-side.
Around midnight, I finally went to bed. I woke up at 2:45am Jan. 22nd with contractions that weren't bad, but were enough to wake me up and not let me go back to sleep. So, at about 3:30am, I called Harmony back and told her about the contractions. She said "Well, it looks like we're having a baby!" and we made arrangements to meet at the birthing home at about 5am. It was cool outside and lightly raining. We settled in, and waited for my family so they could watch Deklan, then Travis and I holed up in the birthing room. It was so beautiful and relaxing...fresh flowers, candles lit, dim lights, and soft music playing, the bed was turned back and waiting for us...it was better than home! I rocked on my ball for a while, then my back started aching and I decided to get into the bed.
Travis got a hot pack for my back, then we snuggled up in the bed with the hot pack sandwiched between us for a while and just let the contractions come and go. They were painful, but I could easily breathe through them. At about 8am, Harmony checked my cervix and saw that I was at 8cm already! And not only that, but when she checked me, the forebag of waters released with a gush. She called in her birth assistant, Jodi, who rushed to the birthing home, thinking it would be soon...well, my ornery little boy threw us all a curve ball!! I got into the birthing tub and relaxed a bit (by the way, I would recommend water birth to ANYONE!). When people call a nice, warm tub of water an "aquadural", they're not kidding...it was amazing how much it relieved the discomfort. I had also studied Hypnobirthing, and was loving how it was helping me relax through each contraction.
After a while, Harmony checked me again, I had actually gone BACK to 7cm! I started to get discouraged, which made me lose my focus, which in turn made the contractions seems twice as painful. After one particularly painful contraction which left me wondering if I could actually do this, I looked at Harmony with what must have been a look of utter despair, because she read my mind and said "Jessica, you are not going to have to go to the hospital." I tried vocalizing through the pain, and found that it only distracted me...made me focus on the pain instead of on the relaxation. At one point, Harmony told me (so softly and gently, but firmly) that if I wasted my energy whining, I wouldn't have enough energy for the rest of my labor! Ha! I really was whining, and that was exactly what I needed to hear. I decided she was right, reached down deep and found my focus again, relaxed, and let the contractions do their job instead of tensing up and fighting against them.
As my cervix was slowly melting away, I tried pushing with a contraction to see if it would complete my cervix, but that didn't work...it just hurt. At her suggestion, I got out of the water (she figured it might have been a little too relaxing!) and tried changing positions. Before I made it to the bed, I had a contraction which came with a wave of nausea and I threw up everything that I had been drinking. I tried laying in bed, but that killed my back. I found that the most comfortable position was sitting on the edge of the bed. With contractions, I circled and swayed, which helped. Finally, I just had a rim of cervix left, but that little bit would not go away! Harmony started giving me herbs to help my cervix finish dilating. They tasted terrible, but I drank the concoctions willingly knowing that they would help. When she saw that I was tired and struggling and that Gavin was having some trouble getting into place, Harmony got behind me and supported my tummy with a rebozo with each contraction, and let me rest against her between them. My belly was so BIG (I forget what my fundal height was at my last appointment...48 cm, I think?) that we thought it, along with Gavin, might have been leaning forward in a strange position that might have been inhibiting him from moving down.
Since my labor had lasted longer than we had thought it might, and since I wasn't keeping much down, Harmony asked if I wanted an IV of fluids, just to give me a little extra energy, and I said YES! I knew it would help. I wanted to be checked again, but at the same time I knew that if I hadn't progressed, I would get discouraged again. So I told myself that I would have her check after the IV bag was empty. When the bag was almost empty, Harmony suggested that I try to get up and use the bathroom, so I (reluctantly...I didn't feel like moving at all) said O.K., and that I'd get in the water again after I went, and she'd check me in the tub. But when I stood up at the side of the bed, I had a massive contraction and it hit me like a ton of bricks that my body was PUSHING...without me! I remember leaning forward onto the bed, roaring like a lion, then looking at Harmony and saying "I have to push!"
Suddenly, a whirlwind! The tub was being filled, my IV was getting disconnected, someone was trying to help me get something on for the walk from the bed to the tub (I couldn't stand the feeling of clothes on me, though), and I was trying to make that forever-long journey from the bed to the tub. I really wanted the tub to get filled in time, so I tried my hardest not to push, breathing (well, it was more like a growl, but it worked!) out the contractions while bearing down instead of holding my breath and pushing. I had two big contractions like that at the bedside while waiting for the water to get going in the tub, the IV to be disconnected, etc. At this point, my friends and family, including Deklan, piled into the room, filming and taking pictures. Travis helped me across the room, me almost breaking his neck as a huge contraction washed over me and I curled into myself while holding onto his neck...poor guy! Then I got in the tub, and my first instinct was to get to my hands and knees. The whole time that I was in the water previously, I had been floating on my back and didn't want to move, but the thought of being like that during this phase never even crossed my mind. The water was only about 4 inches deep, not deep enough to give birth yet, so I breathed (growled) thru another two contractions like that. FINALLY the water was deep enough and I could really work with my body and bear down and push...the first or second time I pushed, he crowned. It burned, but I remembered to relax with the burn and stop pushing, to let me stretch. The next time I pushed out his head...I remember Harmony telling me that his head was out and that I could feel it. I remember reaching down and feeling that smooshy little head and being once again in awe of birth. The next contraction, and a push and joy! that crazy squirmy feeling of a baby being born! Harmony told me to get my baby and I reached down into the water and caught my sweet little boy, and held him to me...I did it!
The last phase was so much shorter with Gavin than it had been with Deklan. Waiting until my body was ready to push was amazing. I remember in my body and in my mind it was so crazy and intense...the thoughts, the sensations, the feelings seemed loud and rushing and incredible. Yet when I watched the birth back on video, it was so incredibly quiet! You could hear the water swishing as I moved in the tub, nobody talking, only water and me breathing. I had a 3rd degree tear with Deklan, and only ended up with a first degree tear and a couple of superficial lacerations this time. I think the perineal massage really helped a lot with that, and also, when he crowned and it really started burning, I tried to breathe and not push and let his head stretch the tissue rather than pushing his head right out. When his head was out, I had still not torn. But he had a little arm right up by his face (nuchal hand), so with the next push it wasn't just his shoulders that popped out, but an arm too. Travis said that it burst out like a sports fan pumping his fist in the air. When I pushed him out and caught him and pulled him up out of the water and held him to me...it was awesome! I held him in the bath until the cord stopped pulsing. I was bleeding quite a bit, so we decided to go ahead and cut the cord so that I could get into the bed and get a better idea of how much I was losing. So Travis cut the cord and held him while I birthed the placenta. Then I got out (thinking how strange and empty and light my belly felt), climbed into bed, and started breastfeeding him. It was so cool. Travis and Deklan climbed into bed with us and inspected him while he had his first meal. While we were in bed and everyone was gathered around us, Jodi showed us the placenta and gave us all a little tutorial. It was really cool to see the organ that we formed and that nourished and protected Gavin for his first 9 months! She showed us the inside, the outside, the sac that was once the bag of waters, the vessels in the umbilical cord and the "tree of life"...the huge blood vessels that supplied blood to the placenta. They also took placenta prints by pressing the placenta and cord onto paper, and it really looks like a tree!
After he had nursed on both sides (I'm sure he needed those few sips of colostrum after such a harrowing journey!) and I had eaten some fruit and cheese and drank some fluids, Harmony took him to weigh and measure him. He weighed in at a whopping 10 lbs., 1 oz., and was 22 inches long! Big boy! It made sense then why my labor took so long.
After he was checked and weighed and got dressed and all, I was taken back to the exam room to get stitched up. Laying flat on my back was so terribly uncomfortable, although Jodi and Holly tried endlessly to make me comfortable. Harmony mentioned how she loved suturing, and I said sarcastically that I was thrilled to give her the opportunity! After that, I took a shower, then went downstairs and had a bowl of soup and got my post-partum instructions. Then we went home! All in all, it was a long (well, longer than I had thought it would be, anyway!) labor...about 11 hours long. But it was worth every bit of it. It alternated between exhausting and empowering. At one point, I looked at my hubby and said "Next time I'm having a c-section!", and was only half kidding. Long labor can be so taxing, more mentally than physically. But then, just minutes after I wanted a c-section, I was laughing to myself when Travis was asking Harmony why I hadn't had a contraction for a long time...I had had two of them, but since I was quiet and relaxed and focused, he thought I was sleeping!! It's amazing to know that you really have that much control over your mind and body...to be in pain and out of control one minute, and resting and quiet and focused the next. Travis was very helpful, but when things got intense, he got quiet because he was worried for me. Harmony helped me so much, encouraging me and grounding me. She did things for me that no doctor would ever have done. Toward the end, when she was in the bed with me, sitting behind me supporting my tummy with a rebozo and letting me lean back against her and rock...it was just a really unique experience. Small things made the biggest difference to me...like when I was sitting on the edge of the bed and circling and swaying until that IV bag was empty, and I saw Jodi sitting cross-legged on the floor at the foot of the bed, silently circling and swaying with me and inconspicuously timing my contractions. Seeing her do what I was doing made me feel like I was doing something right! Even though I'd say that this labor was harder than my first, it was still better. I liked the whole birthing home/midwife experience, and wouldn't have traded it for the world. We learned so much, and with that new knowledge, we are doing things differently this time around, like co-sleeping and babywearing. Gavin is very happy and alert, and is very much attached to us. I think the initial time of bonding immediately after birth makes a huge difference!! Also, the fact that Deklan saw his baby brother "come out of mommy's tummy" helped him adjust easier. It wasn't like we just came home with a new baby. He has really made an easy adjustment and loves being a big brother. And I love sitting and nursing my little guy and reaching back and feeling that soft, smooshy head that I felt as he was exiting me and entering this world, and it just takes me back to that moment. As he's growing bigger and his head is less smooshy, it makes me sad to know that that tangible link to such an awesome part of birth is leaving. I hope someone who loves reading birth stories as much as I do enjoys his birth story! Writing it all down is such a powerful reminder. Now, about that third baby... ;)
Well, my water broke at a trickle at 7pm on Jan. 21st. I was getting off of the sofa and felt a little "pop" in my upper belly. I didn't think anything of it until I stood up and started trickling! After I was sure it was my water and not just me peeing myself (not going to miss THAT finer point of pregnancy!!), I called my midwife, Harmony. Since I had not started having any contractions yet, she told me to go to bed and get some rest. Being as excited as I was, I got off the phone with Harmony and promptly started cleaning my house. After cleaning and making sure everything was packed, I showered. I recall looking down at my pregnant belly while I was in the shower, thinking that this was the last shower I'd be taking with my baby inside of me...next time he would be earth-side.
Around midnight, I finally went to bed. I woke up at 2:45am Jan. 22nd with contractions that weren't bad, but were enough to wake me up and not let me go back to sleep. So, at about 3:30am, I called Harmony back and told her about the contractions. She said "Well, it looks like we're having a baby!" and we made arrangements to meet at the birthing home at about 5am. It was cool outside and lightly raining. We settled in, and waited for my family so they could watch Deklan, then Travis and I holed up in the birthing room. It was so beautiful and relaxing...fresh flowers, candles lit, dim lights, and soft music playing, the bed was turned back and waiting for us...it was better than home! I rocked on my ball for a while, then my back started aching and I decided to get into the bed.
Travis got a hot pack for my back, then we snuggled up in the bed with the hot pack sandwiched between us for a while and just let the contractions come and go. They were painful, but I could easily breathe through them. At about 8am, Harmony checked my cervix and saw that I was at 8cm already! And not only that, but when she checked me, the forebag of waters released with a gush. She called in her birth assistant, Jodi, who rushed to the birthing home, thinking it would be soon...well, my ornery little boy threw us all a curve ball!! I got into the birthing tub and relaxed a bit (by the way, I would recommend water birth to ANYONE!). When people call a nice, warm tub of water an "aquadural", they're not kidding...it was amazing how much it relieved the discomfort. I had also studied Hypnobirthing, and was loving how it was helping me relax through each contraction.After a while, Harmony checked me again, I had actually gone BACK to 7cm! I started to get discouraged, which made me lose my focus, which in turn made the contractions seems twice as painful. After one particularly painful contraction which left me wondering if I could actually do this, I looked at Harmony with what must have been a look of utter despair, because she read my mind and said "Jessica, you are not going to have to go to the hospital." I tried vocalizing through the pain, and found that it only distracted me...made me focus on the pain instead of on the relaxation. At one point, Harmony told me (so softly and gently, but firmly) that if I wasted my energy whining, I wouldn't have enough energy for the rest of my labor! Ha! I really was whining, and that was exactly what I needed to hear. I decided she was right, reached down deep and found my focus again, relaxed, and let the contractions do their job instead of tensing up and fighting against them.
As my cervix was slowly melting away, I tried pushing with a contraction to see if it would complete my cervix, but that didn't work...it just hurt. At her suggestion, I got out of the water (she figured it might have been a little too relaxing!) and tried changing positions. Before I made it to the bed, I had a contraction which came with a wave of nausea and I threw up everything that I had been drinking. I tried laying in bed, but that killed my back. I found that the most comfortable position was sitting on the edge of the bed. With contractions, I circled and swayed, which helped. Finally, I just had a rim of cervix left, but that little bit would not go away! Harmony started giving me herbs to help my cervix finish dilating. They tasted terrible, but I drank the concoctions willingly knowing that they would help. When she saw that I was tired and struggling and that Gavin was having some trouble getting into place, Harmony got behind me and supported my tummy with a rebozo with each contraction, and let me rest against her between them. My belly was so BIG (I forget what my fundal height was at my last appointment...48 cm, I think?) that we thought it, along with Gavin, might have been leaning forward in a strange position that might have been inhibiting him from moving down.
Since my labor had lasted longer than we had thought it might, and since I wasn't keeping much down, Harmony asked if I wanted an IV of fluids, just to give me a little extra energy, and I said YES! I knew it would help. I wanted to be checked again, but at the same time I knew that if I hadn't progressed, I would get discouraged again. So I told myself that I would have her check after the IV bag was empty. When the bag was almost empty, Harmony suggested that I try to get up and use the bathroom, so I (reluctantly...I didn't feel like moving at all) said O.K., and that I'd get in the water again after I went, and she'd check me in the tub. But when I stood up at the side of the bed, I had a massive contraction and it hit me like a ton of bricks that my body was PUSHING...without me! I remember leaning forward onto the bed, roaring like a lion, then looking at Harmony and saying "I have to push!"Suddenly, a whirlwind! The tub was being filled, my IV was getting disconnected, someone was trying to help me get something on for the walk from the bed to the tub (I couldn't stand the feeling of clothes on me, though), and I was trying to make that forever-long journey from the bed to the tub. I really wanted the tub to get filled in time, so I tried my hardest not to push, breathing (well, it was more like a growl, but it worked!) out the contractions while bearing down instead of holding my breath and pushing. I had two big contractions like that at the bedside while waiting for the water to get going in the tub, the IV to be disconnected, etc. At this point, my friends and family, including Deklan, piled into the room, filming and taking pictures. Travis helped me across the room, me almost breaking his neck as a huge contraction washed over me and I curled into myself while holding onto his neck...poor guy! Then I got in the tub, and my first instinct was to get to my hands and knees. The whole time that I was in the water previously, I had been floating on my back and didn't want to move, but the thought of being like that during this phase never even crossed my mind. The water was only about 4 inches deep, not deep enough to give birth yet, so I breathed (growled) thru another two contractions like that. FINALLY the water was deep enough and I could really work with my body and bear down and push...the first or second time I pushed, he crowned. It burned, but I remembered to relax with the burn and stop pushing, to let me stretch. The next time I pushed out his head...I remember Harmony telling me that his head was out and that I could feel it. I remember reaching down and feeling that smooshy little head and being once again in awe of birth. The next contraction, and a push and joy! that crazy squirmy feeling of a baby being born! Harmony told me to get my baby and I reached down into the water and caught my sweet little boy, and held him to me...I did it!
The last phase was so much shorter with Gavin than it had been with Deklan. Waiting until my body was ready to push was amazing. I remember in my body and in my mind it was so crazy and intense...the thoughts, the sensations, the feelings seemed loud and rushing and incredible. Yet when I watched the birth back on video, it was so incredibly quiet! You could hear the water swishing as I moved in the tub, nobody talking, only water and me breathing. I had a 3rd degree tear with Deklan, and only ended up with a first degree tear and a couple of superficial lacerations this time. I think the perineal massage really helped a lot with that, and also, when he crowned and it really started burning, I tried to breathe and not push and let his head stretch the tissue rather than pushing his head right out. When his head was out, I had still not torn. But he had a little arm right up by his face (nuchal hand), so with the next push it wasn't just his shoulders that popped out, but an arm too. Travis said that it burst out like a sports fan pumping his fist in the air. When I pushed him out and caught him and pulled him up out of the water and held him to me...it was awesome! I held him in the bath until the cord stopped pulsing. I was bleeding quite a bit, so we decided to go ahead and cut the cord so that I could get into the bed and get a better idea of how much I was losing. So Travis cut the cord and held him while I birthed the placenta. Then I got out (thinking how strange and empty and light my belly felt), climbed into bed, and started breastfeeding him. It was so cool. Travis and Deklan climbed into bed with us and inspected him while he had his first meal. While we were in bed and everyone was gathered around us, Jodi showed us the placenta and gave us all a little tutorial. It was really cool to see the organ that we formed and that nourished and protected Gavin for his first 9 months! She showed us the inside, the outside, the sac that was once the bag of waters, the vessels in the umbilical cord and the "tree of life"...the huge blood vessels that supplied blood to the placenta. They also took placenta prints by pressing the placenta and cord onto paper, and it really looks like a tree!
After he had nursed on both sides (I'm sure he needed those few sips of colostrum after such a harrowing journey!) and I had eaten some fruit and cheese and drank some fluids, Harmony took him to weigh and measure him. He weighed in at a whopping 10 lbs., 1 oz., and was 22 inches long! Big boy! It made sense then why my labor took so long.After he was checked and weighed and got dressed and all, I was taken back to the exam room to get stitched up. Laying flat on my back was so terribly uncomfortable, although Jodi and Holly tried endlessly to make me comfortable. Harmony mentioned how she loved suturing, and I said sarcastically that I was thrilled to give her the opportunity! After that, I took a shower, then went downstairs and had a bowl of soup and got my post-partum instructions. Then we went home! All in all, it was a long (well, longer than I had thought it would be, anyway!) labor...about 11 hours long. But it was worth every bit of it. It alternated between exhausting and empowering. At one point, I looked at my hubby and said "Next time I'm having a c-section!", and was only half kidding. Long labor can be so taxing, more mentally than physically. But then, just minutes after I wanted a c-section, I was laughing to myself when Travis was asking Harmony why I hadn't had a contraction for a long time...I had had two of them, but since I was quiet and relaxed and focused, he thought I was sleeping!! It's amazing to know that you really have that much control over your mind and body...to be in pain and out of control one minute, and resting and quiet and focused the next. Travis was very helpful, but when things got intense, he got quiet because he was worried for me. Harmony helped me so much, encouraging me and grounding me. She did things for me that no doctor would ever have done. Toward the end, when she was in the bed with me, sitting behind me supporting my tummy with a rebozo and letting me lean back against her and rock...it was just a really unique experience. Small things made the biggest difference to me...like when I was sitting on the edge of the bed and circling and swaying until that IV bag was empty, and I saw Jodi sitting cross-legged on the floor at the foot of the bed, silently circling and swaying with me and inconspicuously timing my contractions. Seeing her do what I was doing made me feel like I was doing something right! Even though I'd say that this labor was harder than my first, it was still better. I liked the whole birthing home/midwife experience, and wouldn't have traded it for the world. We learned so much, and with that new knowledge, we are doing things differently this time around, like co-sleeping and babywearing. Gavin is very happy and alert, and is very much attached to us. I think the initial time of bonding immediately after birth makes a huge difference!! Also, the fact that Deklan saw his baby brother "come out of mommy's tummy" helped him adjust easier. It wasn't like we just came home with a new baby. He has really made an easy adjustment and loves being a big brother. And I love sitting and nursing my little guy and reaching back and feeling that soft, smooshy head that I felt as he was exiting me and entering this world, and it just takes me back to that moment. As he's growing bigger and his head is less smooshy, it makes me sad to know that that tangible link to such an awesome part of birth is leaving. I hope someone who loves reading birth stories as much as I do enjoys his birth story! Writing it all down is such a powerful reminder. Now, about that third baby... ;)
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